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Humour: Letter to Patanjali

Dear Patanjali,

 

thank you for your letter. I appreciate the trust you gave me by sending your nearly finished Sutras attached. I´ve-read it thoroughly and I must say – it´s concise and precise, well done, mate!!

 

It will be the blockbuster of the year if you release it now, people are hungry for spirituality in these insecure days. My public sermons are attended by thousands here in Bodhgaya and not only the rabble, as usual, but middle-class comes as well, Brahmins and even kings..

 

You asked my opinion “how to make your opus immortal and best-selling forever” in your letter.. First of all, mate, I believe there is nothing like “immortal” and “forever”, everything will pass away eventually, I´ve told you many times already. So we must name some limit – so say 25 centuries, OK?

 

Then I meditated in nirvikalpa-jnana for a fortnight to get my answer...:)

 

Take every mention of God out of the book! These days, people here are very religious and devotional but take a samadhi and look yourself into the future! – world will be very different after another 25 centuries of Kali Yuga, the mind and substance will rule it completely and if we want to remain influential, every word must be rational, scientific. They will love it like that in the future...

 

I saw in my visions some smart gurus of the remote future, Shri Sivananda and others of his lineage, who´d understand this future man´s need for explanation and logic and would meet it by adorning the intuitive yogic experiences of the Divine with a robe of scientific approach... in order to move yoga closer to the poor, confused people of the future world.

 

And, Patanjali, if we want our teachings to survive in these chaotic future millenniums, we must be smart and take all the Faith out of all our books and speeches.

 

Also in my opinion all the sutras 193 – 311 about sacrifices should be rejected.. this is esoteric stuff, nothing for general public. The same I reckon about your Vibhuti Pada – it´s good, it´s true, but it is not for laymen. Take it out. If the sales will go good, you can make Volume II For Advanced out of it next year..

 

Oh, brother, just seven monsoons and we will meet in Kumbh Mela with you and other guys from our old pack!! If I wasn´t fully enlightened and completely content with the Presence, I´d be looking forward sooo much...

 

Love, Siddharta Gautama

 

P.S. I´ve forwarded your Sutras to Mahavira after reading as you asked me..

 

Source: Unknown

 

  


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